Are You Too Old to Speed Date?

Tips for speed dating in midlife.

Midlife Daters on a Speed DateSource: Getty Images

Is speed dating right for you?

To midlife daters, speed dating can seem like an intimidating thing. If you've never done speed dating, it involves a small group of daters who rotate from table to table for eight or nine minute increments. At the end of the night, you indicate on a card which person you'd like to talk to again, and they do the same. The hope is that the person you want to chat with again also wants to get to know you better. The downside is that sometimes the people that want to follow up with you aren't the ones you care to see again.

Is speed dating worth it for midlife daters? Absolutely! In fact, speed dating has some definite advantages for those 50 and over.

Speed Dating Is a Good Way to Ease Back Into the Dating World

If you're just getting back into the dating world again, speed dating is a good way to get over your first date jitters, all without having an actual first date. It's easy to chat with someone for just a few minutes, and knowing you will be moving on after that can relieve the fears you might have in keeping a conversation going. After a few table rotations, you'll be feeling more confident about going out on a real date.

The Right Attitude for Speed Dating

Most midlife daters I've talked to said that speed dating was a blast for them. I think this is true if you go into it with the right attitude. Some tips for making the most of your speed dating night:

  • Have fun. Speed dating by its nature is meant to be silly and quick. Think of your experience as an entertaining night that you share later with your friends.
  • Don't take anything personally. If your romantic interest doesn't "pick" you, don't take it to heart. After all, with eight minutes to chat you won't be able to really get to know each other, so their lack of interest isn't a rejection.
  • Be prepared. You know you've only got a short amount of time, so think of a few questions before you go in that will help you find out more about the person. Don't choose a deep subject that will cause the person to chat endlessly for the short time you have, but instead ask something like, "What's your favorite way to spend a day off?"
  • Put the night in perspective. Speed dating isn't a real first date, but a fun experience meant to get you out of your shell and doing something different. If you happen to connect with someone? Great! If not, no big deal.

Speed Dating Events for Midlife Daters

There are some speed dating events especially targeted to midlife daters. This can be a great thing, because honestly, do you really want to go out with a 20-year old? To find the right event for you, check out sites like Hurry Date or Meetup.

Bottom line? You're definitely not too old to speed date. After weighing the pros and cons, you might decide that speed dating may not be for you. But if you're even a little curious, you need to give it a try. What do you have to lose?

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Anonymous | May 28, 2012
Speed dating is my definition of hell....
Anonymous | Oct 6, 2011
I've never tried it, but if they had offered it in my area, I would have. Just another way to meet people. I say try all your options.
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