One of the things I appreciate most about my parents is that my adoption was talked about early on. I always knew I was adopted, because it was something we discussed often. The fact that I was adopted was the same for me as having allergies or blue eyes. It was a part of who I was from the beginning.
On the anniversary of the day I was adopted, my parents would tell me about when they brought me home from the agency as a baby. They talked of the outfit I had on, how I cried and then opened my eyes and stared at them, and how cold and snowy it was that day. My mom was excited and cried for joy at the call that said they could pick me up.
Being Adopted Is a Part of a Personal History
I enjoyed hearing about this story as much as children who aren't adopted enjoy learning about the day of their birth. Hearing about how I came to my family was a meaningful part of my personal history, and I always appreciated that my parents talked about it openly.
In the beginning, we talked about the events that led to me joining my family, but as I got older, things progressed. I would get a card from parents, with a note in it about the day I was adopted. Then later, my mom and I would go out to lunch. After a few years, she started buying a small gift to go along with my special day. While gifts and cards are always lovely, the thing that meant the most to me was talking about the day I joined the family and spending time with my parents. That alone made me feel so special and loved.
Each Family Is Different and Unique
The day I was adopted is an important part of my life. I honor that day and use it as one more reminder to appreciate the blessings I've received. I have a lot of friends who are adult adoptees, and no one else I know celebrates the day of their adoption like this. But that's okay. If there is one thing I've learned, there is no "one size fits all" solution. For some open adoption is the right answer. Other adoptees have no wish to meet their birth family. Some celebrate adoption days like I do, while others don't. There is no right or wrong, but only what works for each person family and adoptee.
More in Family and Relationships:
- Do Adopted Children Really Feel Abandoned?
- Creative Ways to Get Mom and Dad to Share Their Memories
- How to Get Your Siblings to Help Care for Mom and Dad
