Online dating is one of the best ways to meet someone new if you're a midlife dater. Your online profile allows you to give a positive impression to potential matches, so it's important to have it reflect the fun, attractive, and irresistible person you are.
Choose a Photo That Reflects Who You Are Today
By far the biggest "oops" midlife daters make is putting up a profile that is several years old and doesn't resemble who they are right now. If you want to date online successfully you have to take some current pictures. One option is to find a photographer that specializes in photos specifically for Internet dating. Type in a search for "online profile photographers" and see what comes up near you.
Another option is to just hang out with a friend and take several different pictures with a digital camera. Choose one or two outfits to vary the look of your photos, and create a visual vignette that helps illustrate the things you like to do. Photos you should take include:
- One great headshot that shows you from the shoulders up, with a clear view of your face and smiling naturally.
- One full-length photo of you doing something you enjoy.
- One "action" picture that will help illustrate your profile. For example, if you like to bike, hang out at flea markets, garden, etc., try posing (as naturally as you can) surrounded by items that reflect that. A standing shot with you just about to go for a bike ride, one of you in the garden, and so forth. While these pictures will be posed, try to make them look as natural as possible.
Let Your Natural Voice Come Through in Your Personal Essay
Too often, online daters feel like they need to "sound" a certain way in order to attract attention to their profile. The great thing about dating in midlife is you know you don't need to pretend to be anything but who you are, so underscore that attitude with your essay. A good rule of thumb is to start off with a mention of things you like to do, followed by a cute or funny anecdote, and rounded out with a little bit of info on you. (Also, avoid saying these five things in your profile.)
Some additional things to keep in mind:
- Make it short. A personal essay should be no more than two or three paragraphs.
- Keep it positive! Your essay isn't the time to talk about why your ex-husband is a lout or why your former girlfriend was the worst person you ever met.
- Avoid listing miscellaneous traits out of context. For example, "My friends say I am loyal, eager, responsible, reliable…." and on and on. This is not only boring, but it doesn't give a potential match any idea of what you are really like.
Be Clever With Your Headline
Every inch of your online profile can tell someone a little bit about you, so don't forget to use the headline to make yourself stand out even more. Rather than something boring ("Looking For a Nice Guy," "Trying This Out"), use the space to give a hint about what your personality is like.
- A short line from a movie you like.
- A line from your favorite poem.
- A nickname you have.
- A few words that describe something you like to do.
Sometimes all you need is a few quick revisions to your profile to make yourself stand out from the thousands of profiles already online at some of the top dating websites.
- Are You Hiding Your Dating Life From Your Kids?
- How the Dating Mistakes Of Your 20s Benefit You Now
- How to Love