When Divorce Hits Home -- Chapter 2: The Fear of Being Lonely

I'm afraid of being alone after a divorce.

What happens when an unwanted divorce hits home?Source: Getty Images

I don't want to wake up and have no one else there, but divorce may mean just that for me.

The biggest fear that has gripped me in going through a divorce is being alone for the rest of my life.

I'll still have four more years of my youngest son living at home at least half of the time while he goes through high school. And my oldest son, now a sophomore in college, has said he wants to live at home while he gets a master's degree.

But what happens after that? That's what scares me.

When I got married, I imagined my wife and I getting old together. When one of us got sick, the other would bring soup and drinks to the bed. When one of us was injured, the other one would act as chaperone.

When one of us was ready to die, the other one would be there to comfort and soothe.

Now, I wonder what's going to happen to me that day in the distance when I have a stroke or some other illness and there is no one at home to call 911 or to take me to the hospital.

I'm also scared of experiences in my future where I'll be the only one there.

There is no one to hold hands with, no one to laugh with, and no one to cry with.

Yes, we had our disagreements, but I always believed that love would overcome those obstacles. Now, that belief has been replaced with doubt and a lack of confidence. Whereas I was once filled with confidence about what my future held, I'm now overcome with the feeling that I have no idea where I will be in a year, much less five or 10 or 15 years from now.

I'm 46, and I'm looking at another 30 years of an active lifestyle. I want to see the world, and I want to live my life to the fullest.

But that no longer seems as exciting or interesting when you do it alone.

Next Up: Telling the kids

Just joining Chris' story? Check out what you've missed here:

Chapter 1: Out of the Blue

Chapter 2: The Fear of Being Lonely

Share Your Thoughts
For your protection, ensure that no personally identifiable information (like full name or email address) is submitted in your comment.

CAPTCHA
This tests that you are really a person and not a computer.
Image CAPTCHA
Enter the characters shown in the image.
Your Privacy
Trust is a cornerstone of our corporate mission, and the success of our business depends on it. P&G is committed to maintaining your trust by protecting personal information we collect about you, our consumers.
Anonymous | Mar 20, 2013
Honestly, I think this fear is why I fought so hard for my marriage, even when my husband made it clear that there was no rebuilding it. He promised me forever. He promised to be there for all of those major life events. Now, all of the things I wanted, the things WE wanted, I'll have to do alone. They're exciting things, yes, but they become painful experiences when done without the one person you thought would be enjoying them with you.
Anonymous | Sep 15, 2011
Wow- Very real emotions that have hit close to home for me this same year. If you have never been though this, you really have no idea just how much it impacts your every action, and invades your thoughts continually. What you held onto as rock solid in your life, is shown to be only an illusion. Now you question so many of your long held beliefs, and are hesitant to make desicions based on them.
Anonymous | Jul 26, 2011
nothing but a bottle of Jack Daniels won't take care of.
follow us
Subscribe to Newsletters
X
About Life Goes Strong Contributors
Newsletter Sign Up Friends
Newsletter Unsubscribe Contact Us
Mobile App Sitemap