There's no question that Arnold Schwarzenegger is a cad. A big cad. He cheated on Maria Shriver before they were married. He cheated on her after they married. He fathered a child with the housekeeper. When he realized he had a son with this woman, he kept this secret from his family until his wife confronted him. By this time, the boy was already fourteen years old.
It's despicable enough that Arnold did all these things. But most of us weren't focusing on it anymore. It was big news a year ago and we all have short attention spans. We concluded that Arnold was a jerk. We felt sorry for Maria and the kids. Then we moved on. After all there are always more scandals. More news. More and more schadenfreude. What's going on with Lindsay? Or Britney? Are Brad and Angelina ever really going to tie the knot? Will Jessica Simpson lose her baby weight? Why did Justin Bieber vomit on stage?
We all forgot…except Maria and the kids.
Until Arnold reminded us last night with an appearance on 60 Minutes.
This week he's making the rounds on news and morning shows to promote his just-released memoir, Total Recall: My Unbelievably True Life Story. Sure, he discusses all aspects of his life—his childhood, acting, bodybuilding (he devotes nearly 200 of the 656 page book on his bodybuilding days). But let's face it, no one is buying the book to read about Arnold's weight lifting regiment.
While Arnold says having the affair with the housekeeper was the "stupidest" thing he's ever done in his marriage, Arnold is not stupid. During the 60 Minutes interview he explained how he was a millionaire in his twenties due to savvy real estate investments. Arnold knows the scandal alone could propel his book sales into the stratosphere.
So why do it? Some celebrities write memoirs because they need the money, but Arnold doesn't need the money. Some celebrities write memoirs because they want to reinvent themselves. But during the interview with 60 Minutes, Arnold didn't seem remorseful or introspective. He didn't talk about lessons learned or how he's a changed man. "I'm not perfect," was the only explanation for his bad behavior.
Arnold has said that he still loves his ex-wife. If he truly did love her, why would he thrust a woman who is extremely private back in the spotlight? Why would he humiliate her all over again? I can't imagine that Maria gave the book her blessing. Arnold said during the 60 Minutes piece that Maria hadn't read it.
So why? He was so likeable as a killer robot. Why did he have to remind us that as a human being he's not very likeable at all?
Is he bored? Now that he's no longer a huge box office draw, will he do anything to be in the spotlight? Everything he's done—he's done big. A big body. Big blockbuster hits. The governor of one of the biggest states.
Perhaps next on his list was a big bestselling book?
Well, let's not let it happen. We already know the story. We don't have to buy the book.