A conversation with Betty White begins this way:
Reporter: "Hi Betty. Are you hot in Cleveland?"
Betty: "Not as hot as you, dear."
Reporter: "At best, I'm only lukewarm."
Betty: "I know the feeling."
Spend 45 minutes with the star of "Hot in Cleveland," and a few things are a given: You will laugh, you will think, and you won't complain about anything …..maybe for the rest of your life.
Her healthy, positive attitude isn't just contagious. It's a good lesson for any midlifer.
White, who will be 90 in January, says all of us in our 40s, 50s, 60s and beyond could use a little reality check. Here goes:
"I think everything revolves around your mental attitude," says Betty. "So many of us start dreading age in high school. That's such a waste of a lovely life. Yet, I hear people say, 'Oh my gosh, I'm going to be 30. Oh no, I'm going to be 40. What will I do? I'm going to be 50. Life is over. I'm 60!"
"At every single age, make the most of it," she says. "If you're blessed with good health like I am then you should wake up in the morning as a grateful human being."
White also has a great healthy tip that doesn't cost anything or require a prescription or office visit. "I know your mental attitude can improve your physical life. I'm proof positive."
GETTING OLDER? GET OVER IT.
Betty is part of a new AARP campaign called Get Over It, designed to help people accept and embracing aging. Betty has already gone through dramatic midlife changes that many of us are going through now and she has great advice on how to happily navigate these years.
White says that keeping active is key to your mental health. She knows many people at midlife are now looking at many more years of working and can't retire early anymore due to the economic recession.
"Instead of thinking, 'This is terrible I still have to work,' I wish people would accentuate the positive and say, 'I know I'm tired, but instead of complaining, I'm going to celebrate where I am right now."
She says that it's never too late to explore a career passion. If you always wanted to write then try it. If you want to teach then find a way to volunteer with kids.
"If you're lucky enough to still be functioning, congrats for starting a new career in you '50s or '60s," she says. "You'll feel good. We talk ourselves into negativity and say, 'But I can't do it.' At that moment, slap yourself on the wrist and say, 'Cut it out! Get over it.'"
EMBRACE THE YEARS
Betty looks at all the positives of getting older – and says we can (gently) remind our aging parents of her attitude.
"With age, you get a license to practically steal. People spoil you rotten and take such good care of you," she says. "I'll be on a set and I'll be standing and waiting to do my lines. I'll turn around and somebody has pulled up a chair behind me.
"Whether I want it or not!" she says.
Betty says that age has also given her a wisdom that she finds comforting.
"I love the perspective aging gives you. You look back and hopefully the experiences you've gone through allow you to feel positive about your life. The key is to enjoy the experiences while they're happening — instead of when you're looking back."
A FEW HEALTHY BEAUTY AND FUN TIPS
Betty says that she focuses on healthy living tips to look beautiful and feel great. She says that we shouldn't alarm our aging parents about being more fragile now, but provide a few gentle reminders to keep them healthy.
"I try to take care of my good health. I walk, but I walk carefully now. I know a fall wouldn't do me any good. I look ahead and try to watch out for myself."
Betty also says having fun shows on your face. That's why she plays poker on Friday nights.
"We played last Saturday night and I won a whole dollar," she cries. "I usually leave about five dollars on the table. That's why I'm going to frame that dollar."
To keep her mind active, Betty is also a crossword puzzle addict.
"I can't ever pass up a crossword puzzle. If I get a new puppy and put newspapers down, I'll spot a crossword puzzle on the ground and tell the puppy, 'No, no, no. You can't go on that!'"
AND NOW A WORD ABOUT …SEX
Betty famously played sexpot Sue Ann Nivens on "The Mary Tyler Moore Show."
"The neighborhood nympho," Betty says in a sweet voice.
What is the secret to love at any age? Betty says often it's about coping with loss.
"Sure, you miss the love of your life," says Betty who was married to Allen Ludden who passed away in 1981. They met when she was a panelist on his show "Password"
"I miss my beloved Allen every single day. In fact, every once in awhile I find myself saying good morning to his picture.
"I know I'm nuts," she says. "But I'm happy."
She will even tell a story. "Once someone asked Allen about my roles. He said, 'Sue Ann Nivens can cook anything, but she isn't the nicest gal in the world. Betty and Sue Ann are the same person, except Betty is nice and she can't cook."
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